The Fart - 21:36 - 10/08/2016 ... Gonna edit this. But yeah: If I had a hundred wishes that could magically happen, one of my more frivolous ones would to be able to break-wind for like twenty minutes per rip. Imagine. To fart for anything over ten seconds is my idea of bliss. To release a gust from your arse for half a minute would feel, would feel. It would almost, on the odd occasion, when you've wanked a plenty, it would almost feel as enjoyable as ejaculation. Just now, watching the OLYMPIC men's all-around gymnastics final on the laptop, I dropped one. As a Chinese man with a flat-top hair somersaulted over a high bars, my gut squelched and with a move down it went toward my backside when the air gave like a little rip, a coda, before silence and then it came like a P-WHARP elongatedly and the sound opened as the pressure increased and the noise I think was the wind squeezing thru the crinkles around the hole of my anus and the displacement of gas from bladder to the room's atmosphere, the lightness it put inside my body, felt good. It piped out trumpeting into almost a crescendo I felt that moment but in hindsight to describe the sound and the soul of the fart the best words would be: It whimpered. It stunk of last night's turkey slices, a gamey pong I've noticed rise thru my skin and maybe there was a tang in the odour when taking a piss. But yeah. I love to fart, trumping I called it as a kid. It's weird though how I feel embarrassed when farting in front of women. But anyway, write this, something to do. I farted. It felt good but not as good as ejaculating. I wanted to fart more but couldn't. The End.